Find your Joy

I have had a lot of comments either in person or on line regarding my #findyourjoy.  It is really something I try to live everyday. Everyone has their struggles, and this mantra applies to anyone.  Just find one thing you can be joyful for. The sunshine, the birds singing, a restful night, a little time without pain etc.

One thing I have noticed by doing this is how negative people can be.  I get very uncomfortable when I hear negativity now, especially from people who I can see where all of the joyful things are in their life.  I have to remember that I don't know where people are at in their own personal lives, and I need to gently remind them or encourage them to find a positive.

So, now that I feel comfortable as to where I am at with my joy journey, it's time for the next step. ME, I am the next step. My neuropathy is something I cannot find joy in, I constantly remind myself that I am cancer free, but the neuropathy is permanent and it does interfere with my daily living more often than not.  So, I am going to focus on me. I am making some small, sequential changes in my physical life that I will be sharing as I go. I have been doing a lot of research on peripheral neuropathy and will be making these changes starting this week. So..... stay tuned!



P.S. Mark is doing well, we are still awaiting initial determination on Social Security Disability, so keep us in your prayers and keep finding your joy!

Last of a Legend

So, today marks the final performance of Mary Poppins at Pioneer High School. It also marks the last show at Pioneer High School for Wyn Roll. It has been such an immense pleasure working with him for all of these years. We have butted heads quite a few times, but have always remained friends.  Why? because we both always have looked and will look at everything we do from the perspective of "what is best for our students".  I am proud to have had the privilege to work with him on the production team, and I will carry the knowledge he has given me forever. Wyn Roll is a legend! The Pioneer community is lucky to have had his wisdom and leadership for so many years.  Even though Mary Poppins flies today for the last full performance, this show is not over.  The show and cast are nominated for the Kenny award.  Let's go get 'em today and win this for Mr. Roll!

Organize

Now that I've taken a year to really concentrate on the joys in my everyday life(which I am going to continue doing), I want to think about getting organized.  So, the next few blogs will be about how I'm getting organized.  I've always though I was fairly organized, but when I got sick, then Mark had his stroke, I realized I wasn't necessarily organized in the places I needed to be organized in. 
Starting really small, on Sunday December 31st, I was going to go grocery shopping for the week.  I had our meals planned, and a list in hand ready to go.  Mark said to me "Hey, let's re-organize the pantry before you go grocery shopping, it's a bit of a mess."  It was a great idea. We took everything out of the pantry, and lined it up on the kitchen cabinets and table, re-organized it, and put it back.  BOY DID I FIND A LOT! So much, that I didn't go grocery shopping and we are trying to eat from what we have for a week or two? I needed milk and butter, so we got that today, but Eat from the Pantry is underway!
Sunday 12/31- I had beef stew planned, so made that
Monday 1/1- My mom invited us over (Yea MOM!)
Tuesday- I had been to a Tastefully Simple Party and had a Potato Cheese soup mix(which I added leftover ham), and Bountiful Beer Bread


Stay tuned for the rest of the Pantry clean out!!!

Organizing is great!

New Blog Title

I've decided to keep #findyourjoy as my 2018 theme. I've also decided to turn it into my blog name.  I kept My New Journey, as I'm always on a new journey as the event that caused me to start this blog with that title had such a profound impact on me.  So..... I'm going to use that hashtag when I post, and I'll be blogging about other words I contemplated using as my 2018 word.  I hope that this blog as well as my posts bring you joy, and help you when you need to remember your joy.  Plan on seeing more posts from me, and when you are having trouble finding your joy, reach out to me, and this community of wonderful people who have written to me about finding their joy.

It's been awhile

It has been awhile since I have posted here. My journey is still continuing.  I have scans next week. They've scheduled a mammogram, an MRI, and a bone density scan.  If the Mammo and MRI are clear, I can go to yearly scans! The bone density is for one of the cancer drugs I am on.  What a cycle. I still have problems with peripheral neuropathy, and the meds do not always keep it at bay, so I may have another med change. I'll know in January.  I'll deal with the neuropathy though as long as the cancer doesn't return.
Now onto Mark. I am sitting in the waiting area at the Neurologist as I write this. He is going through 4 hours of cognitive testing.  The doctors need this testing so they can write a report that hopefully disability will accept.  Basically, Mark sees something, and his reaction time to what he sees is slow. The part of his brain that interprets what he sees and tells the part of the brain to react to that was damaged when he had the stroke.  He has difficulty reading, writing, driving in traffic, processing what he wants to say, and has a lot of difficulty in crowds.  I am hopeful that this piece will help us get the disability he deserves. 
He is frustrated sometimes because physically he looks great. The physical things came back with 6 months of PT. So, people think he is fine. We don't see many people socially anymore as it can be difficult for him. Too many people tires him, and he just can't function well, or he manages but needs two days to recover. So, please understand if we haven't seen you lately, or Mark seems distant when you do see him, or he doesn't talk much, it's part of what happened to him. Also understand that if he seems normal to you that he is working VERY hard at it.

It's like my cancer. After I was done with Chemo and radiation and my hair started coming in, it didn't mean I wasn't still feeling the effects or wasn't tired anymore.

So, pray for Mark and I as we continue on our journey. We are doing great and are completely blessed by awesome family and friends!
Love to you all and Merry Christmas! #findyourjoy!

August 2017

A lot has happened recently.  I am over a year out of treatment, and I have clear scans.  I really thought this journey was over, but as I'm sure all of you know, Mark had a stroke in February.  It was a vertebral artery tear. Basically, there was a tear in his artery, blood clots collected behind the tear, and all at once they broke loose sending 100 or more clots into his brain.  He was in the hospital for 5 days, and just recently was discharged from PT.  Now comes the hard part. See, his cognitive skills were effected.  He can't be in crowds, he has trouble concentrating, he can only read on his best rested day at an early 4th grade level, and he still has physical issues such as muscle movement or muscle memory, and speaking when he gets over tired.  Now the long road to recovering those issues starts.  6 more months will tell a lot they tell us.

My New Year

Last Friday was the one year anniversary of my diagnosis. This is my new year. As much as I have control over certain things, I have made resolutions. I live my life differently. I don't let the little things bother me as much, and I truly feel sorry for people who get caught up in unnecessary things just to make themselves look or feel better. That feeling they have is only temporary. I pray more, read more, talk more, feel more, and have become much more stable in who I am.
There are down days too. I posted on my facebook wall that I have cried more this last month than in the last year mostly due to my frustration of my limitations. I am still limited physically, mentally, and emotionally. When I get very busy those things rear their ugly heads. I'm still figuring out how to deal with that when it happens.
This blog is not finished for me, because this journey is not finished for me. Today, I have to go and have my port flushed and they are doing bloodwork in preparation for my scans in November. I wouldn't be honest if I didn't say I'm nervous about the upcoming scans, but I have other things to concentrate on right now. Like myself, school, my dissertation, and of course my daughter's wedding!